"I, therefore, the prisoner in the Lord, urge you to walk worthy of the calling you have received, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, accepting one another in love..."
Ephesians 4:1-2
Walk with gentleness, and accept each other with love. Gentleness precedes love here, because one cannot love if the attitude is harsh. One must be gentle to show that love which covers and bears all things. We must be gentle.
I'll speak from a personal battle today, and ask humbly that you indulge me as I open my heart on this particular point. Gentleness is probably the most difficult of these concepts for me. I have trouble approaching situations with a gentle spirit, because I am naturally a "black and white" kind of Type A personality. I see things for what they are and what they're not, and I have little use for gray area. I am extremely opinionated, as my friends and family would testify. So this particular point is one that I must focus on.
As a husband, any man's first and highest calling, I fail to be gentle 100% of the time with my wife when I speak to her. I fall into the trap of familiarity that comes from being married over a long period of time (almost 10 years now... YAY!!!), and I pick on her about things that aren't always funny to her. I forget that I should be so gentle as to see this possibility of her NOT being amused BEFORE I make any specific remarks in this regard. And, further, I shouldn't be picking on her at all, really... she's my wife, the one and only person on the planet who CHOSE to put up with me forever. I owe her a better husband than I am in this regard. To make a profound point, she is the one person whom I never have to act differently for... but more importantly, she is the one person for whom I wish I could be the very best version of me possible!
As a father, the second greatest calling in any man's life, I am not as kind in instruction with my three children as I should be. My "simple" view of things in the "it either is or it is not" mentality that I have is sometimes not enough to TEACH them. I answer too quickly, and then I cut them off in doing so and repeating that answer, and then I ask why they didn't understand me. I give no allowance for time and grasping the deeper concepts... by the way, they are 7, 4 and 3, respectively, and I manage to speak with them as though they were all at least 25. I owe them a better daddy than I give, and it can all be brought forth through gentleness.
As a son, a blessing all men have, I am not always gentle to my parents. I assume that because they are older than me that gentleness is unnecessary, as they will totally understand that I am the way I am. After all, they made me, right? Wrong. They are my parents, but they are also people with feelings, and I ignore those for the same reasons of familiarity.
As a colleauge, I place little emphasis on gentleness, due to the fact that I am in the work environment. I say, all too often, "I didn't come here to make friends." This is true, and it is true for everyone. But why not allow it to happen? I have no need to answer too quickly and not let people just say what they think, but I do it anyway. Oddly, I cannot seem to figure out why I do this, but I guess it comes from the same place of familiarity... only this time, it's a place that we, as colleagues with a common pursuit for income, share. Flawed reasoning.
It's amazing how God can show one person through one word in the Bible a ray of light that shows many things to be different from what that person perceived. I am almost to the point of tears as I read over these thoughts, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me to be so open with you. But I would ask, is any of this a concern for you, too? Do you have difficulty in these areas? If not, then I am proud of you! But if you do, then join me as I pray for a greater understanding of what it means to be a gentle spirit to all I encounter, and honor the Lord in doing so!
God bless you all!!!
Loved this entry!
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